one of those times

The other day I was laying in bed and thinking. It was one of those times where I just couldn't sleep. I was thinking about life, love, happiness, and security. Sometimes (as emo as this might sound) It's hard for me to imagine myself having all of those. It's those times where my motivation and inspiration feel like they are at an all time low each time. I just want to sleep for years and years and not wake up. But then I do go to sleep, I wake up, and everything is a lot better. Maybe it's something about night time? I'm not sure.

But the other day I woke up and I still felt the same. I tried to play a little guitar and it felt like my fingers had a mind of their own and didn't want to move at all. I just thought about all the things that make me feel not happy inside. So I decided to watch a movie...

Usually when I feel like that I watch 500 days of summer (which is my all-time favorite movie for those who don't know) and it almost 100% always makes me feel way better. Unfortunately I didn't have that movie this time so I decided to watch the movie Burlesque. And that movie actually helped so much! It made me feel as good as I was the day before.

This is Christina Aguilera. She is the main character in burlesque. And after watching that movie I discovered how amazing her voice is! I have never really listened to her music before. Just a few songs. But this movie brings out her voice really good.

There is a song called Bound To You that's on the soundtrack that I am obsessed with at the moment and it's way good. I recommend everyone to listen to it.

P.S.

I find Christina Aguilera to be gorgeous! And not to mention her hair is just amazing.

One day I will meet her and get a picture with her.

song..?

So a while ago I was listening to Celine Dion. And something happened. Mid-way through the song I stopped it and all of this just came to my head and I was just writing and writing without even thinking. It's like I stepped out of my own body, and was looking down at my self just writing away. It's almost one of the best feelings ever because it kind of feels like you've achieved something great using only the knowledge that you have or something like that.

I originally wrote this as a song. But for the past few months I can't come up with any melody, or any rhythmic patterns or riffs on the guitar for it. After trying and trying, so I thought I would try and "Poemize" it. Hopefully it works out good.

       I got the idea from a friend who went through a very hard breakup. The song tells a story in a first person point of view. A guys' point of view. It's a story of how his girlfriend... his "Love of his life" breaks up with and he finds it extremely difficult to get over it. He keeps asking him self "Well what if I did this instead of this?" or "What if I were to say this instead of this?" all these "What if?" Questions. I think almost everyone who's ever had a relationship can understand. And throughout the song he ends up finding a way to get over her and accepts that what has happened has happened. Instead of being sad and depressed and mad at him self for "what if" he instead moves on with a smile on his face and knows the past is past and there is still a bright future ahead. I think that's what everyone's outlook on life should be. It might be really hard but if you can you should because it's probably worth it. Anyway here it is.



If every midnight awake turned to gold
It would be enough where you and I could always safely sleep together
If all the whispers we made became true
Then our hearts would beat in sync and every breath we took would only last forever

Now those days are gone we both have waken from a dream
I have always seen the moonlight in your eyes
Now that it has gone the magic turned and walked away


To turn it all back around
If I could run back in time
If I could do this again
Would you still walk away from me?

To remember our dreams
All the moments of soul
If I could make it all shine
Would you still walk away from me?


We thought we love
We thought we had it all right
There are things that still confuse me
And I never know why
Is everything all worth it?
Or is it time for me to say goodbye?

I guess I never knew you baby


Love can be hard
And it breaks you to tears
But it all turned to dust
Back when you walked away from me

How can I love again?
How can I be the same?
My life turned around
Back when you walked away from me


I had some time to think and time to realize
I had made myself into a slave
But now that it's all over I can finally breath again


To turn it all back around
If I could run back in time
I wouldn't change how we felt
I would still let you walk away

Just remember our dreams
And our moments of soul
We can look back and smile
At the day that we walked away


We thought we had love
We thought we had it all right
There are things that still confuse me
Now I never ask why
Everything was worth it
And the time I finally said goodbye

I just thought and smiled


At the times we had made
From the laughs that we shared
From the promise we made
Before you walked away from me

We had loved once before
We can love once again
We both choose to forget
And it's not hard to walk away

Moving on from the past
It's so simple to walk away

To forgive and forget
It's all worth it to walk away in the end

umm... amazing much?

So I went to the mall. Got my self a "Caramel Ice Storm" from the nordstrom coffee place. (Which is almost the best coffee ever!) I was sitting with a friend outside of nordstroms on some chairs next to a fireplace and I look across the distance, and at this store I've never heard of called "Mod Bod" or something, there was something that just amazed.

Yep, this is what amazed me! It's summer! And it's a pea-coat... sun dress type thing? I don't know but it is beyond beautiful! Sometimes I wish I could be a girl so I could wear stuff like this. But guys' fashion is pretty boring for the most part so I do what I can with it.

most recent obsession

 

        

               Lately I have been obsessing over different hair styles and fashion. I've been leaning greatly towards Zooey Deschanel's sense of fashion and her hair style. They just amaze me. Not to mention she has an amazing oldies-sounding singing voice.